Male Sexuality: Trusting the Stallion

Men: Trusting the Stallion

I am here to help you discover, explore and express your full, authentic, masculine sexual energy; energy I refer to as Stallion energy. If you have ever had the great fortune to spend time around stallions, you might know why I would use this analogy. Contrary to most current belief (which is fearful of stallion energy and cages and isolates it as wild, dangerous, unpredictable, antisocial energy), stallions are the most necessarily and willingly social individuals in the herd. They thrive on social interaction, free of constraint and fear. The mares in the herd regulate as a group to give the stallion clear messages about what is acceptable and what is not (women....this is our work to do as well). Because of this, the stallion can move among the herd protecting, playing, maintaining his critical status and experiencing himself as an integral interactive part of the whole. If he is isolated and treated as a threat (how we treat him in domesticated settings), he becomes unpredictable, enraged, dangerous and antisocial. All the sophisticated mechanisms he is endowed with, for reading individual and group needs, for assessing danger, for play, for mating, for protecting his territory and his herd, are short circuited. All the energy that is masterfully designed to enable him to be exactly who he needs to be, in service of his community, becomes warped and he is no longer vital, trustworthy or integrous. It is essential that your innate stallion energy be a vital, integrated aspect of your experience; that you live in a state of aliveness and engagement with the world without shame, shut-down or confusion. But let's be real. We live in a culture which is deeply fearful of your primal expression. And the price you (and the rest of us as well) pay for this fear and its resultant shut-down is catastrophic. Without an intimate connected relationship with your wild self, the stallion energy in you, you cannot engage with the world in a way that has meaning, purpose or power. Instead, you are forced to either deny critical desires, longings and wisdom (thereby stifling your generative creative energy) or 'act out' in ways that jeopardize those people and things most important to you, like family, partnership, community and work.

There is much we don't understand about this stallion energy. We have neutered this energy to simply mean sexual desire for conquest, variety, multiple partners etc. Yet in my experience it is so vastly more sophisticated than this. Your multi-layered brain is designed to allow for, and require, a multiplicity of intimate connections that have extraordinary meaning to you. But in our culture very few speak to this, let alone teach this.

The fundamental process of ReWilding invites you to re-engage with your body: with sensations, feelings, awareness, aliveness, pain, grief, rage and more. This includes a candid assessment of those behaviors /processes/substances with which you engage, which numb your full-throttle awareness and engagement with self and other as well as the erotic themes which guide your sexual engagement and fantasies. From here you are invited to own your sexual story: all of it from innocence and joy to shame, fear and shut-down. Then we work to reacquaint you with your sexual expression without the shroud of shame. What does the true man of you want in the world and how does he go about pursuing it without apology, truncation or dishonesty? We will then assess what you need to learn about the actual practical, physiological functioning of your pleasure (which includes your partner's pleasure).

You may have a desire to become a multi-orgasmic man, or may simply want to have mastery over the arch of your pleasure for the longevity of your life. Perhaps you are seeking a true sense of vitality and presence that doesn't necessarily feel sexual to you. No matter what your desired outcome or goals, the process of ReWilding will reacquaint you with the profound body of your innate wisdom while also endowing you with the tools, language and permission you likely did not get as you became a man in this culture. From this place of wealth, you will have the potential to achieve your fullest vision and dreams while experiencing yourself as a powerful, empowered member of your community.